Well then, who’d have thought it. All First Division tie, which means that a First Div team will make the semi’s.
And more importantly – I’ve went all the way to the Quarters and avoided a Premier League Club!! Could we carry it on to the Semi’s ??? Surely Not?
Canny wait for the 8th of March at Palmerston, this WILL be a cracker! Both teams dreaming of the Semis at Hampden.
You having kittens down there in Dumfries Jim?
See you soon Doonhamers.
Fiery jack
Or The Scottish Cup Trail Explained
Or Travels with my Rant!
Sundays Scotsman newspaper had an article entitled “How to become a comic adventurer” which was both amusing and familiar. The article was mainly about Dave Gorman’s new adventure in the US where he is planning to travel around the US avoiding giving any cash to franchise corporations and buying everything from “independent” stores, petrol stations and hotels. He is also renowned for his “Googlewhack” (I won’t explain it, but if you haven’t seen it, it is an insight into the obsessive/compulsive/stubborn – call it what you want – mind). It also highlighted other individuals such as Danny Wallace and Tony Hawks, who also set themselves tasks which were both ridiculous and compulsive – you see where I am going with this?
Danny Wallace is known for his “Join Me” Cult and his “Yes Man” book in which he decided to answer Yes to every question he was asked for six months to see where it would take him. Tony Hawkes wrote a book called “Round Ireland with a fridge” in which – no prizes here for guessing – he travelled around Ireland with a fridge to win a £100 bet.
The Cup Trail, though less lucrative, and I’m sure – funny, fits quite nicely into the category described in the article. It’s a compulsive thing and the real adventure is that for a certain moment you never quite know where you are going and what will develop, and to coin Tyler Durden’s philosophy “you have to just let the chips fall where they lie!”
The article proclaims ” The appeal of all these people is that they do things many of us idly talk about to friends but would never have the time or the obsessive streak actually to carry out. They are also, arguably, the adventurers who define the times we live in. When every part of the earth has already been conquered, even serious quests seem faintly pointless (third person to climb Everest without oxygen etc). Knowingly silly adventures have a peculiar integrity to them – they’re an act of rebellion against conventional notions of heroism, and perhaps the ultimate example of making ones own, enriching entertainment in a consumer culture that spoonfeeds us trash. If you can get a bestselling book out of it, all the better.”
I kinda like some of that. And not because it makes the Cup Trail look like some sort of attempt to retrace Scott footprints across the Antarctic or to follow Tenzing and Hilary up Everest, in particular I like the bit about making your entertainment in a totally random manner. And lets face it, it puts some (not much I’ll grant you coz I’ve had a few comps on the way) dosh back into the game which would otherwise go elsewhere.
So I thought, if you read through the various postings already displayed, it might not be entirely apparent what I am doing here. So, here are the basic rules for Following the Scottish Cup Trail.
First Rule of the Scottish Cup Trail, you do not talk about………….Na only kidding there!
Firstly, in advance of the First Round proper draw for the Scottish Cup, which now has Junior teams playing in it, bribe your mates into coming along with you to the games. This usually fails, or is successful until the first match and then expect the call offs to come flooding in. Then, all you have to do is wait for the draw to be made, and determine where the nearest home game is to you. This is your first game. I am open to suggestions on ways of making it more random/entertaining i.e. the first home team drawn with the same first initial as your porn name (I’m sure you all know your porn name, first pet and mothers maiden name).
Now it’s easy from here on in cos you are now following random!
Follow the winning team (not necessarily supporting them, but you can if you chose to) as they go into the pot and listen nervously for your next fixture. And so on and so on until Hampden and the final in May. A wee tip here, if you get a draw which means a trip to Fir Park, I wouldn’t book a train ticket until about 7.15 on match night!
Bonus points are awarded for avoiding the Old Firm, and double bonus points for avoiding the Old Firm at home. Nothing against the Old Firm, I have supported them both in my time – you don’t want to know, honest! – but the thrill of the Cup Trail is absolutely and categorically in watching the smaller teams progress. I have been very fortunate this year, and just to recap, here are my fixtures to date:
Glasgow University FC v Buckie Thistle
Buckie Thistle v Nairn County
Greenock Morton v Buckie Thistle
Greenock Morton v Gretna
Gretna v Greenock Morton (replay)
Greenock Morton v Queen of the South
and coming soon….. Queen of the South v Motherwell or Dundee
So, all of you couch potatoes out there, get up off your arses and do it. I’d love to hear from anyone else who has done or is doing the Cup Trail, whatever version, and if anyone is thinking of doing it next year, get it organised early, and who knows, we could have match reports and funnies from ALL the Cup Trailers as they wind their weary way from different starting points to end up at Hampden. And you know, if a couple of hundred of us do it and get there, those “songs” that embarrass our national stadium that we know and hate so much on Cup Final day, may just sound a little quieter.
Why not “Join me” as Danny Wallace once said?
Fiery Jack
As a result of my own incompetence combined with the remnants of a hangover from last night, I managed to completely lose all 965 words I had written just I as I was about to hit the Publish button. Feck and Pish and every other mild swear word I can think of! I still don’t know how I managed to do it but I firkin did!
So, now for a rather abridged second attempt. Oh and since the disaster this afternoon, Hibs and Rangers have drawn 0-0 in what appeared to be a rather exiting match at Easter Road, The Quarter final draw saw Queen of the South at home next to Motherwell or Dundee (so it’s back to Palmerston – see you there Jim? – and I have managed to avoid going to Parkhead or Ibrox!)
Lets get it done then!
Greenock Morton 0 – 2 Queen of the South
Cappilow, Greenock, 2nd February 2008
A call earlier on in the week confirmed that we had comps, and I managed to get a lift to Greenock into the bargain – ta mate! So off we set, and a wee special mention to young Hawkster and Chris who accompanied us to the game, thanks guys for joining the Cup trail!
A decent crowd had turned up. And a small throng of Queens supporters congregated behind the goal and burst into song immediately. It was obviously warmer than they were used to in Dumfries as a handful of them proceeded to take their tops off to reveal some pasty torso’s. It was baltic, and gained a cheer from the stands.
However, there is always one isn’t there. Not content with the top off, off come the kegs. Unfortunately he forgot he still had his boots on, and the trousers managed to tangle themselves around his ankles. Teetering on the terrace, this milky white Buster Bloodvessel, dressed only in his best underpants, now attracted the attention of Greenocks finest. They swooped quickly to quell this unruly behaviour, and whatever was said, resulted in Buster being ejected from the ground wrapped in a saltire. I’m sure the Queens and Morton fans have seen more obscene sights ON the field of play on their travels!
In the meantime the game kicked of and straight away it was obvious that this was a game which both teams were up for. A lot of tough tackling and some quite obvious personal vendettas ensued. Queen of the South had most of the play in the first half and most of the chances. However, easily the best chance of the game fell to Peter Weatherson who, for some reason chose to attack a cross from the right with his head rather than his feet, resulting in a great save from Jamie Adams in the QotS goal. Half time arrived 0-0 the scoreline.
Time for Coffee, crisps, bovril, marathons (not Snickers) and the vegan diet goes oot the windy yet again! During the break Old Hawkster points out a bird (feathered variety for a change) hanging by the neck from the rafters in the stand “The football’s no that bad, is it?” he says. And I look down the other end of the stand and there’s it’s mate in the same suicidal position. Penny drops. They are dummy birds of prey up there to scare the shit out of any pigeons looking for a cozy perch and a place for some target practice on an unsuspecting fan below. And it crosses my mind “Four hawk(e)s in this stand and two of them are sitting next to me”
Game starts with a bang. Queen of the South go one up as a corner from the right is met by Sean O’Connor with a clinical header high into the net. The Queens fans go bonkers, I just hope Buster Bloodvessel got back in to see it. You would have thought that would have sparked Morton into life, and as a neutral I was sure this would make a game of it. It didn’t however, and all Peter Weathersons hard work and effort up front came to nothing. As is almost always the case, just when Morton were on the verge of scoring and potentially taking it back to Palmerston, Queens went up the park and scored. A well taken goal by John Stewart from a parried shot sealed the tie for Morton. And the cheering of the Queens fans was just about heard over the clatter of seats in the Morton stands as bums left them in a hurry.
Final whistle went. A fan shouted for Mcinally to go and the DJ (obviously with a sharp sense of humor even if he is now probably out of a job!) fired the PA up with Talking heads “Road to nowhere”. Very funny moment!
Roll on Palmerston. Apart from the tecky problems earlier, I’m beginning to love the way this whole random Trail is working out!
A wee thanks to The Queen of the South website and David Gow in particular, I have “borrowed” a picture from it (above) which shows Buster Bloodvessel in discussions with the polis just prior to his early bath! You can see him at the front of the crowd with the St Andrews flag wrapped around him! Will we see him at Palmerston? I’ll keep my eyes peeled.
Fiery Jack
Check out www.qosfc.com/07report.htm for some nifty video of the goals and celebrations at the end!
